February 18, 2009
By Donald Starver
Here at Steelers Today, we are not content to sit back and speculate on what the Steelers are going to do during the off-season. Instead, we prefer to take a more proactive approach.
We’ve hacked into Steelers head coach Mike Tomlin’s PDA, and we were able to locate his “to do” list. Here it is, exclusively on Steelers Today.
Mike Tomlin’s “to do” list
- Convince Dick LeBeau that it’s not appropriate for me to call him “dad”.
- Find more ways to use the word “men” at press conferences.
- Sucker Ken Whisenhunt into signing Chris Kemoeatu.
- Make James Harrison run more 100 yard dashes.
- Convince Bruce Arians that “fullback” is not a bad word.
- Send Terrell Owens a free agent contract on April Fool’s Day.
- Pretend to respect the Cleveland Browns and Cincinnati Bengals.
- Sucker Ken Whisenhunt into signing Willie Colon.
- Teach Ben Roethlisberger the difference between a broken toenail and a broken leg.
- Send 50 cases of rice cakes to Casey Hampton’s house.
- Explain to Limas Sweed that wide receivers are supposed to CATCH the ball.
- Place Jeff Reed under house arrest to avoid more “incidents”.
- Mandatory drug tests for Santonio.
- Get fitted for ring.
- Sign contract extension.
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